It was the day that I had secretly been waiting for, yet couldn’t (and wouldn’t) consciously admit it to myself. Call it a gut feeling, a whisper from God, or the numerous nudges from my husband and a few close friends. The seeds that were planted were beginning to bloom. And for that, I’m so grateful. The day I’m referring to was the day that I had “my enough”. That day was July 5th, 2016. […]
If you asked me ten years ago about my knowledge of wine, I could easily rattle off the different varietals and regions worldwide. I prided myself for knowing more than the average person and gave myself the distinguished title of “Wine Snob”. And… so I was. I elegantly disguised my wine habit as my wine hobby. I wasn’t just a social drinker. I was a wine connoisseur. I was a big California red know-it-all, and […]
I have a confession to make. There are occasions when I become “unglued”. I turn into a crazy person who cries and yells simultaneously. It’s not pretty. And God bless my husband. He sits back and allows me to have my fit, not saying a word. He lets me have my temper tantrum, and when it’s over, he hugs me and tells me it will be okay. Sometimes my initial response is to escape from […]
Why does time seem to melt away the negative memories, yet accentuate the perception of the good memories? So, what happens when you only remember the good? Think back to a time where you may have laughed, been silly, or maybe a little crazy. You had a great time at the moment, but the aftermath or duration was horrendous. You paid it for it dearly with a massive hangover, a fight with a loved one, or […]
Have you ever told yourself a convoluted story that was so intricately woven with thoughts only to find out none of it was true? It’s easy to do when our brains have an average of 50,000 to 70,000 thoughts per day. This can create havoc in our minds, and we end up manifesting our destiny without knowing the implications. So what is the secret on how to stop your mind from racing? This is important as […]
Maybe you’ve recently heard the term, gray area drinking, and wondered if it’s okay to be in the gray? Anytime we put the words, “okay” and “alcohol” together, I raise an eyebrow. If you’re asking what the heck is gray area drinking, you can read more here at, What is Gray Area Drinking. If you’re someone that enjoys bourbon on the rocks or a glass of red Napa Valley Cabernet from time to time, this […]
When I first contemplated ending my drinking career in August 2016, I gasped at the timing. “Maybe I should wait”, I thought. After all, my BIG birthday was just around the corner in January. We had plans to go to a Caribbean island with two other couples to an all-inclusive resort where alcohol would be free-flowing. My mind started swirling as I went into panic mode. The anxiety was unbearable. How would I survive this? […]
You’re standing at the crossroads and know a decision must happen, but you’re frozen. “Why is this so hard?”, you wonder. Vulnerability, embarrassment, and shame are the reasons that prevent you from reaching out for help. That, plus a little denial mixed in. Maybe you aren’t ready to admit that you even need support. After all, you’re a professional and need to “look the part”, and conduct yourself as such. It’s too risky to let […]
A question all sober-curious drinkers dread is, “why aren’t you drinking”? The silent gulp in the throat, the spinning thoughts for a convincing response, and the deep insecurity of exposing oneself is enough reason to say screw it and give in. The societal pressure, overall acceptance, and expectation of drinking alcohol can be overwhelming to those trying to moderate or abstain. Wherever you go, there it is. As a former drinker myself, I experienced comments […]
Having a challenging childhood and attending 12 different schools in just nine years, I was that awkward kid that tried too hard to fit in. You know the type, right? I did “all the things” to get the attention and approval of others. This led to immense deflation of any possible self-worth. It was the perfect set up for what I refer to as living in the gray. I was bullied in kindergarten for being […]
Hi! I’m Kari Schwear, Founder of GrayTonic, and the Question the Drink movement.
I’m a perpetual life-learner, a 7x career path conqueror, Executive Lifestyle Coach, Author, and Speaker. I’m also a former hot mess that was stuck in several gray areas of my life (drinking being the top one!) and wondering how I got there. This blog is a columniation of my methodology, teachings, beliefs, and personal struggles that I’ve endured over the years. I hope it blesses you.