Why Asking for Help is Hard
You’re standing at the crossroads and know a decision must happen, but you’re frozen. “Why is this so hard?”, you wonder.
Vulnerability, embarrassment, and shame are the reasons that prevent you from reaching out for help. That, plus a little denial mixed in.
Maybe you aren’t ready to admit that you even need support. After all, you’re a professional and need to “look the part”, and conduct yourself as such. It’s too risky to let anyone know what’s going on. You can’t believe it yourself! How in the world did this happen?
What is the problem?
The moment you hear your inner voice question your behavior is the moment you receive the answer. The problem is we turn a blind eye, so we don’t have to deal with the issue. It’s as though you reverted to that young child in bed, pulling the covers over your head to keep safe.
If you ignore it, maybe it will go away.
Or perhaps you aren’t ready to be without your vice/distraction/numbing behavior. It’s become a part of your life. It’s become a friend, something to do, it’s fun, you like it, scared to be without it, helps you to relax, and the list goes on and on.
What are the facts?
The facts are the behavior is causing you stress, shame, money, time, energy, and your self-worth.
You choose not to see it as truth in fear of losing it. Maybe you’ve tried playing games with yourself, such as alternatives or moderating the behavior. You’re successful for a short duration just to prove to yourself that you “could do it”, but it lasted only a short time.
Why Asking for Help is Hard
Fear is crippling. It will lie to you and keep you stuck. The ping-pong ball in your head will continue. The stories you create in your mind won’t end. Your brain will always produce excuses and reasons why you should keep going and now isn’t the time.
What if you knew that you could have everything you want in life?
Some examples might be:
- Freedom to do what you want
- Zest for living
- Discover deep self-love
- Be fully present for your family and loved ones
- Active life
- Physically fit
- Purpose in life
If you knew you could have all of that, would you reconsider and move past the fear?
So, what is holding you back?
Maybe you’re saying now isn’t the right time, or you can try later.
Are you willing to wait one more day to transform your life?
Your head might be saying one thing, but your heart already knows the answer.
Steve Jobs quoted:
“Remembering you’re going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart.”
Give yourself the gift you deserve; the gift of asking for support.
It’s not shameful; it’s courageous.
Take the first step by reaching out for help.
You have the power within to see it through, press through, and soar through. You can’t change all things, but the ones you can, you will.
Start today by putting yourself first. After all, you can’t be good for anyone else until you fill your cup first.